Middle of the Night Thoughts

It’s late, and I’m awake. Which is stupid, but here I am – insomnia winning. Anxiety winning. Sleep losing. 

I haven’t figured out quite what causes my insomnia and anxiety on a normal basis, however tonight I’m guessing it was the late night glass of iced tea. What? I was thirsty, and it was good. So sue me. 

Also weighing on my mind is the fact that life is hard, man. It really is. People around me are hurting. And there are bills, and responsibility, and my kid is starting 8th grade, and just crap… and I just don’t want to deal with all the crap. 

I’m running low on patience and people are just rubbing me the wrong way. And I’m telling you guys, my tribe gets smaller by the day. 

I look around me at all the pain that people deal with on a daily basis, and I just realize that I don’t have time for people who are selfish, and inconsiderate, and just plain mean. 

I live my life outloud, and this is one of those moments where living outloud is maybe obnoxious to everyone else… but this is me. Life on loud speaker. Tonight I’m grouchy, and I’m tired, but I can’t sleep, and I want to eat a friggin bowl of ice cream and not gain 17,000 pounds. Can I get an amen? 

Well, scattered and grumpy as they may be, those are my middle of the night thoughts. Who else is awake with me right now? 

~Aleah

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